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| If it looks like shit, smells like shit, mail it to your enemy -- he'll know what to do with it. | | Altruism and Cynicism | | |
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| If wishes were fishes we'd all be throwing nets. If wishes were horses we'd all ride. | | Success and Failure | | |
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| It's not a question of happiness, it's a requirement. Consider the alternative. | | Life and Death | | |
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| Life is good when we think it's good. Life is bad when we don't think. | | Life and Death | | |
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| Love is seeing without eyes, hearing without ears; hatred is nothing. | | Love and Hate | | |
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| No one can drive us crazy unless we give them the keys. | | Love and Hate | | |
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| Search for meaning, eat, sleep. Search for meaning, eat, sleep. Die, search for meaning, search for meaning, search for meaning. | | Life and Death | | |
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| Seeing the light is a choice, not seeing the light is no choice. | | Life and Death | | |
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