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| After an instrument has been assembled, extra components will be found on the bench. | | Success and Failure | | |
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| After the last of 16 mounting screws has been removed from an access cover, it will be discovered that the wrong access cover has been removed. | | Success and Failure | | |
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| All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. | | Success and Failure | | |
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| All this wheeling and dealing around, why, it isn't for money, it's for fun. Money's just the way we keep score. | | Wealth and Poverty | | |
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| Always borrow money from a pessimist; he doesn't expect to be paid back. | | Wealth and Poverty | | |
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| Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else. | | Life and Death | | |
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| Always remember your weapons system was made by the lowest bidder | | War and Peace | | |
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| Always remember your weapons system was made by the lowest bidder | | War and Peace | | |
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| An authority is a person who can tell you more about something than you really care to know. | | Science and Religion | | |
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| Anarchy may not be a better form of government, but it's better than no government at all. | | Law and Politics | | |
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| Anthony's Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner of the workshop. | | Success and Failure | | |
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| Any small object that is accidentally dropped will hide under a larger object. | | Success and Failure | | |
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| Any time you think you have influence, try ordering around someone else's dog. | | Success and Failure | | |