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| Caution: breathing may be hazardous to your health. | | Unknown | | |
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| Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners. | | Unknown | | |
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| Children are unpredictable. You never know what inconsistency they're going to catch you in next. | | Franklin P. Jones | | |
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| Children aren't happy without something to ignore, and that's what parents were created for. | | Ogden Nash | | |
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| Children in the front seat cause accidents, accidents in the back seat cause children. | | Unknown | | |
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| Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said. | | Unknown | | |
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| Cox's Philosophy: Life's a bitch, and then you die. | | Unknown | | |
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| Death and taxes may always be with us, but death at least doesn't get any worse. | | Unknown | | |
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| Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy. | | Unknown | | |
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| Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired. | | R. Geis | | |
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| Death is nature's way of recycling human beings. | | Unknown | | |
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| Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down. | | Unknown | | |
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| Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you. | | Woody Allen | | |
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| Death meant little to me. It was the last joke in a series of bad jokes. | | Charles Bukowski | | |
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| Decay is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence. | | Buddha | | |
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| Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to him. | | John Barrymore | | |
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| Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many. | | Unknown | | |
