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| Any time things appear to be going better, you have overlooked something. | | Unknown | | |
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| Any time you think you have influence, try ordering around someone else's dog. | | Unknown | | |
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| Anyone who uses the phrase "easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried taking candy from a baby. | | Unknown | | |
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| Anything not worth doing is worth not doing well. Think about it. | | Elias Schwartz | | |
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| As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error. | | Weisert | | |
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| As you ramble on through life, brother, whatever be your goal: keep your eyes upon the donut, and not upon the hole! | | Murray Banks | | |
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| Associate yourself with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation, for 'tis better to be alone than in bad company. | | George Washington | | |
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| Attempt the impossible in order to improve your work. | | Bette Davis | | |
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| Be nice to people on your way up because you'll need them on your way down. | | Wilson Mizner | | |
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| Blessed are the meek for they shall inhibit the earth. | | Unknown | | |
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| Blessed are those who expect nothing... for they will not be disappointed. | | Unknown | | |
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| Blessed is the person who is too busy to worry in the daytime and too sleepy to worry at night. | | Unknown | | |
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| Boob's Law: You always find something in the last place you look. | | Unknown | | |
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| Boren's Laws: (1) When in charge, ponder. (2) When in trouble, delegate. (3) When in doubt, mumble. | | Unknown | | |
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| Bradley's Bromide: If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in. | | Unknown | | |
